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Writer's pictureMaya Grossman

3 Tools To Stop Playing Small

Did you ever stop to ask yourself what is actually holding you back?


When I work with people I usually ask about their goals and dreams. And after they tell me what they want to achieve in their career I ask: "and what is stopping you?"


Most people need a minute to think because they are not sure, but then they say something along the lines of:


- I don’t have an MBA


- My manager hates me


- It’s not a good time


- It goes against company culture


Bla Bla Bla...These are all excuses.


The truth is there is only one thing that is holding people back from maximizing their potential: fear. The only thing that is making us play small - is us.


We're afraid we might fail and look stupid in front of our friends, family, and colleagues. So we make our ambitions smaller. We stay in our comfort zone where it's safe.


What people tend to ignore though, is that staying in your comfort zone is not risk-free.




The cost of playing small

Playing small has a few side effects.


1. Felling frustrated, resentful, demotivated, and bored. I don't know what about you, but I do not want to feel this way every day.


2. You find it hard to feel self-worth when you make your ambision smaller and you are not living up to your potential. Deep inside you know you are meant for more, but you keep trying to convince yourself it's okay to be less than what you can become.


3. When you play small, you are inviting people to see you the same way you see yourself. If you make yourself small, you are teaching others to treat you the same way.


4. You are leaving money on the table. Low risk - low rewards.


5. You are sabotaging your own happiness.


It may seem like playing small is a safe option, but not living up to your potential is a disempowering behavior with a ripple effect.



How to stop playing small

Let me start by saying unleashing your potential is a process. If you've been holding yourself back you'll need to practice getting yourself out of the fear zone. It will require time and practice to let go of the fear and start taking action, but if you take small steps - you'll get there. Here are a few practical tools to help you start practicing living up to your potential.


1. Give your present self advice from your future self